Rules I Did Not Write

You said the word policy on Tuesday and you heard yourself do it.

She had asked for something reasonable. Not unreasonable at all. And there is a rule about it, and the rule is not yours, and you said that it is policy and you moved the conversation on.

Every word of that was true.

Here is what was also true and did not get said.

You agree with her. You think the rule is wrong in her specific case and you would have decided it differently in about four seconds if the decision were yours.

You did not say that. And the reason you did not say it is that saying it felt like disloyalty to the arrangement you are in, and you have never worked out whether that is a real obligation or a habit.

So you hid. That is the honest word for it. You put a rule between yourself and a person and let the rule take the weight.

She was fine about it. That is almost worse. She said no problem, which is what people say, and she went back to work.

And you have thought about it since, because you can feel what a year of that would make of you.

There is a verse about people who are responsible for others and it is very short and very specific about what is required.

Just and equal

Paul writes one line to people who are responsible for others.

Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven. (Colossians 4:1, King James Version)

Just and equal. Two words about how a person is treated, and nothing at all about who wrote the rules.

The verse is not addressed to a policy maker. It is addressed to somebody standing between the people above him and the people in front of him, which is exactly where you stand.

You have been given a responsibility that is entirely about treatment rather than about policy, and the Holy Spirit is the one who has put you in that position. Colossians 4:1 asks for what is just and equal rather than for a change to the rules, and He has never once asked you to author the rules you enforce.

Now the second half, which is the part that matters most for Tuesday.

Knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven. He reminds a man that he is himself under somebody.

That is not a threat. It is a sightline. It tells a man where to look when he is deciding how to handle a person, and it is not up the chain of the arrangement he signed.

You are answerable somewhere that has nothing to do with the arrangement, and it is written that the one giving what is just also has a Master in heaven. The Spirit of God is the one holding that sightline, and Colossians 4 is where it is drawn.

And here is what that settles about the disloyalty question.

There is no obligation anywhere, in Scripture or in any decent understanding of an agreement, that requires you to pretend a rule is your own opinion.

Following a rule and endorsing a rule are two different acts. You are obligated to one of them. Nobody anywhere is owed the second one.

You have been carrying an obligation nobody ever placed on you, and the Holy Spirit is the one who takes that off a man. The written word requires the just and equal treatment rather than an endorsement, and Colossians 4:1 is where the actual requirement is stated.

What hiding actually costs

Let me be exact about the damage, because it is not to the arrangement.

Nothing you said on Tuesday hurt the company. The rule got applied. Everything happened correctly.

The damage is to her, and it is small and it is real. She now believes that you looked at her request and thought it was unreasonable, because that is what a policy answer with nothing added to it communicates.

That is not what you thought. And she will never know that unless somebody tells her.

You have left something untrue standing rather than doing anything wrong, and it is written that what is required is the just and equal handling of a person. The Spirit of God is the one who shows a man a small false impression he has left behind, and He shows it without accusing.

And there is a cost to you as well, which is what you actually felt on Tuesday.

Every time a man puts a rule between himself and a person, he gets slightly further from the person. Do it for a year and there is a set of people who no longer bring things to him, because they have learned what comes back.

That is not loyalty to anybody. That is just distance.

You are able to stop that this week, and the Holy Spirit is the one who catches this in a man at four days rather than at four years. Scripture puts the whole obligation on treatment rather than on policy, and Colossians 4 is where the standard sits.

Tell her which part was you

So here is the thing to do, and it is one sentence, and it is not a criticism of anybody.

Find her. Say: that thing on Tuesday, the rule is the rule and I have to run it, and for what it is worth I thought your request was completely reasonable.

That is it. Two clauses. The rule stands and the man is visible.

You are separating the rule from yourself rather than undermining anything, and Colossians 4:1 asks for what is just and equal from the man in the middle. The Spirit of God is the one who is present in that sentence, and He does not need it to be a large conversation.

Notice what that sentence does not do. It does not criticize the rule. It does not say the rule is wrong. It does not invite her to be aggrieved about it.

It says the rule is real and so is the man applying it, and those are two separate facts. Nobody is undermined by that and nothing is being encouraged.

You have a way to be honest that costs the arrangement nothing at all, and the Holy Spirit is the one who makes one sentence do that much. The written word never once asked a man to disappear behind a rule, and Colossians 4:1 is the ground for saying it.

Then go on running the building, and the rule is exactly what it was on Tuesday.